When you realise you’re turning into your Dad.
Growing up, my brothers and I were lucky enough to be able to look up to our amazing parents
As a young boy I always looked up to my parents. I understand that not everyone can say this, and my brothers and I are extremely lucky to be able to say we had such a stable and happy upbringing. Both our parents worked from as far back as I can remember. Often seeing Dad arrive home from work, just for mum to say goodbye as she left for her night job. Both workers, both installing life’s important lessons as we all grew up.
30 years on and I now find myself in the same situation, trying to illustrate the same important teachings that my parents passed down to me, but onto my children. While trying to pass on these pearls of wisdom, I’m noticing many similarities between me and my Dad. When you’re younger you expect your Dad to embarrass you and some of these similarities certainly did, but now I don’t care. I realise now some of the reasoning behind these traits and behaviour, reasons I now understand as I’m a Dad too.
Let’s get to the similarities then shall we?
When you reach a certain age or maybe it’s the arrival of kids, the aches and pains kick in. Could it be the constant carrying, rocking, lifting or being jumped on by your children that cause these discomforts? I don’t know, but it can’t be a coincidence, even writing this now my back is killing me, you would think I’ve spent an hour or more at the gym! Anyway, these aches and pains cause what I call “Dad noises”, everyone’s heard them. When I lived at home, the rooms would often echo of my Dad being summoned by one of us or my mum. Shortly after this call to action, Dad would get to his feet with a roar of discomfort. I’ve now noticed the same noises coming out of my own mouth, even if I am not in pain or unpleasantness – It’s almost like a habit now! One, I’ve tried to shake but I fear it’s bedded in now as part of me!!
The second thing on my list of similarities involves money. Dad has always been rather prudent with his money. We never claimed poverty in our childhood years, although Dad would sometimes suggest we were! Never one to waste money where it could be saved, he would/has always looked for the better value for money option. Once again this is me. When it comes to purchasing anything I’m always thinking ” do we really need it” or “Poppy already has 100 Barbie dolls, does she need anymore?!” Even coming down to Poppy’s school uniform, we bought five white girly polo shirts when she first started school, one for every day of the week. Until Stacey mentioned to me last week we need to buy more as some are stained already. Me and my new, tight arse personality, weren’t having that at all. Out came a bucket filled with water and a splash of bleach and hey presto, brand new white shirts, no need to spend £10 of five new ones! Even I’m embarrassed by this, I know I shouldn’t be – why waste money when you don’t have too???
The last little bit I’d like to share, one my dad may not find as funny as me, is the strange and sometimes humorous faces he’d pull when he’s trying not to clip us round the ear! Yes, sometimes my siblings and I were little sh*ts and needed to be put back in our places every now and again. You’d hear the footsteps start in the kitchen, then the steps would turn into stomps coming up the stairs, getting louder and louder until he’d come busting through the door. The door would swing open and this normally so calm and reserved man would be trying to pull an intimidating face and failing. I now do exactly the same with Poppy when she needs telling off. As I get out of my chair (bellowing out an achy dad noise of course), I stomp down the hallway, we have no stairs to clatter up, right up to my daughters room. My tongue rolled over my bottom teeth, eyes narrowed, eyebrows scrunched revealing the tired crows feet and wrinkles on my haggard face. AND… she laughs or even worse just ignores me. All that theatrical effort for nothing, what a waste of my acting talent!
I admire my Dad. If I can be just half the man he is to my children I’ll be happy and I’m sure my kids would be too. He’s a great man and I’m proud to call him my friend and Dad.